Thursday, March 19, 2009

Repercussion of an act

Sometimes we don’t really give so much thought on the repercussion of our act; like I am. Ok most of the time I would think but when it’s about friend, I wouldn’t really mind. I love shopping, dining or doing just about anything with all my friend, male and female. But being at my age, even though I have many female friends, they are already married and can’t spend times with me like we used to. The single ones like Hanim stayed too far. So there’s this bunch of male friend left for me and I treat them just the same like my female friend in which few of my female friend said I shouldn’t. Coz if I treated everyone the same, how would that guy (if any la kan) wanted to mengurat me or to see any hints that/if I like him. Hmm… that is true but I guess if I really like that friend, there’s some extra attention towards him kot. But everyone got extra attention too. Hish really lah, how huh?

I love being with my friends for with them I can be myself; with all my true colours. And everyone has their own specialties. A friend for my heartache, a friend to discuss on religious matters, a friend to dine with, shopping with, a friend to gossip with, to fight with (not a serious one ok), to exercise with and to do just about everything lah.

Lately I spend most of my times with En. Nasrol. Being in the same department makes things easier. We eat breakfast, lunch and sometimes dinner together. We shop together and En. Afnan would join us sometimes. I know some guys hate it when a lady went shopping but I found that this 2 guys are crazy about shopping too. In fact crazier than me. Recently I bought a new shoes and again it was En. Nasrol who’s there waiting and commenting. And yes even though I spend most of my times with them, I still called them Encik Afnan and Encik Nasrol. Hehehe…

If peoples notice my existence ( I don’t know, I always felt I’m invisible), they might think I’m a playgirl. Eh last time I saw this lady with a different guy. Now with a different guy. Long time ago I saw her with different guy also. How many boyfriend does she really have huh? Many. Hahaha… coz they are my boyfriend, not lover right.

There are good and there are bad about this actually. The good things are, I learn a lot on guys’ behaviour, their taste, mood swing etc. Guys are actually like us too but in a different way. They are sensitive, fragile, moody, love shopping and everything lah. The bad things are I might miss the chance of being mengurat by a guy for they thought I already have a steady man. Peoples might think I’m fooling myself or wasting my times with all this guys in which I assure you I’m not. Or maybe toying with someone’s heart/feelings in which I’m not too.

But seriously, when a guy (that I don’t or barely know) said he likes me I would be like huh? And suddenly I’m not myself. Not acting or controlling but you know when we met with new peoples we wouldn’t just jump and shout like we normally do to those we already with. And I don’t like that. I’d prefer to start with a friendship first because when a friend did something bad or hurting us, we tend to be more forgiving than when someone we hold special in our heart. I’m not sure about others but that’s me. So, to love me is to be my friend first. Hehehe….

And I’m not dating anyone at this time yet. Eh ni macam nak mempromosi diri plak ni. No lah just an explanation in case you all see me with different guys.

I was thinking about this because of last night incident. We might not think seriously about what we did but peoples have their own view and judgment that sometimes or most of the times is not what we think or intend to do. Just make sure that we know our limits and do not go overboard.

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